Courage in danger is half the battle won by blogger Snehal Gajare

I’m wounded; my heart, my mind and my soul are screeching in pain.

I’m choked with fear, striving to breathe again and again.

Everything seemed to have come to a standstill..................................  

Then came the moment filled with hope and not despair;

I mustered courage and was aware;

I was no more a victim but a courageous fighter, as

I had emerged as a Survivor.

Domestic violence and sexual assault are heinous of crimes committed against humanity. In the present days, these crimes have reached increasing heights resulting in a social outcry from various organisations, volunteers and various sects of people across the globe. According to me Domestic violence occurs when an individual is victimized through assaults, attacks, abuse by a partner who is in an intimate relationship with that individual. In certain cases, it may include abuse by a family member too. The scope of domestic violence is extremely wide and can also include sexual assault. On the other hand, Sexual assault is also a victimization of an individual through any sexual activity without his/her consent. Sexual assault includes any form of sexual harassment, exploitation, unwanted sexual contact, rape, and sexual abuse.  Domestic violence is committed by a person who is always known to the victim whereas in case of sexual assault, the perpetrator may or may not be known to the victim.

In cases of domestic violence the situation is extremely difficult due to the emotional involvement of the victim with his /her assailant. In such cases emotions like love, affection, and pity can overpower the victim’s persona and he/she may be reluctant to accept the very fact that he/she is in an abusive relationship and fails to come in terms with the magnitude of betrayal. In sexual assault cases, the victim is in a non-plussed situation trying to figure out why he/she had to go through such a devilish, ill-fated punishment without any fault on their part. Social stigmatization of the victims is another nightmare that the victims have to deal with. Victims of domestic violence and sexual assaults are often drowned into the dark alleys of victim -blaming and self blaming.

I’m neither a doctor nor a counsellor but just a common woman.  As a woman I feel every victim (he/she) is a survivor who deserves to heal. You always have the right to say “No” and “Stop”.  Life is beautiful and you should not opt to live with fear. You ought to speak up if you wish to receive help.  Speak up your mind to your near and dear ones. Joining support groups can help you in perceiving things differently.You can also get help through professional counselling. Try to build up your confidence. You are not alone. Remember, you have survived; and that’s because you are strong enough to fight your way out.

When Love Gets In The Way by blogger Karly - Benedictine University

A situation becomes a lot more difficult when the victim of sexual assaults is in a relationship with the person that is assaulting them. The emotional attachment that the couple shares has the power to overcome the fact that their relationship is extremely unhealthy. It would be different if the person that was abusing the victim was not “in love “ with them, but when you add love into the mix it can become messy. We have to take these factors into consideration when addressing sexual assault prevention to the assailant that is dating the victim. Since the assailant is in a relationship with the victim it would be appropriate to have them take part in the same prevention program.

I can see why this could cause a few issues. The victim might be scared to even be in the same room as their attacker when discussing the events that has gone on in their relationship. So it might be easier to calmly sit down with them individually and figure out their separate stories. Don’t accuse either of them of anything. Just listen to their story to figure out if there is any deeper meaning as to why the abuse is occurring. Then once there is somewhat of an understanding, sit them together and have them talk about their problems in a healthy way.

For some reason it is so hard for me to express how I feel about this topic. I thought it would be easy to just rant on about how awful it would be to suffer in a relationship where sexual abuse is present. But all that keeps coming to my mind is that there is no excuse for abuse. It is just unnecessary and sickening. I am fortunate to be in a loving relationship with someone that I trust and know will never turn on me this way. I am no doctor. I cannot prescribe medication to someone that is suffering with abuse. I am here to express what I think can be done to prevent these acts from occurring in the future.

This subject is far from easy to talk about, but unfortunately it happens so we must find a way to help those in need. You never know what a person is going through. I am not defending the assailant in this case, but they could have a really messed up past. They might have not always been this way with their partner. They could have been a very loving person, and something small could have triggered the insanity and caused them to sexually abuse their partner. Like I said, you never know a persons full story by just looking at them. It is hard to share what I would do in this situation because when you truly love someone, it makes it that much harder to leave him or her when something like this happens. You believe they will change back into the person you remember. We need to start by listening to a person’s story, and then take it from there. I am no expert, but I know that it feels good to vent.

               

No Exceptions by Saint Louis University blogger Abigail

The National Institute of Justice states that 85-90% of sexual assault victims know their assailant. It does not imply that all of those victims are in an intimate relationship with their partner, but a relationship nonetheless. This makes the concept of sexual assault that much harder to address – as a friend, you might see warning signs of abuse but not want to make a confrontation out of it; as part of the relationship, you might deny that the other person would ever do anything to hurt you.

As a society, we need to put emphasis on the value of communication in relationships. A healthy relationship of any type requires communication. A loving partner knows that the other partner’s feelings and moods are subject to change and that is okay. Yes means yes; no, maybe, any sort of hesitation, saying nothing… means no. “We’ve done it before” doesn’t give infinite consent. Whether the assailant is someone’s partner of 10 years, 3 weeks, or not at all, they are not the exception to this rule. Consent is important every time.

By supporting concepts like “yes means yes”, the conversation about sexual assault becomes more and more preventative. It is important to speak up for yourself and those around you, but mostly to continue to remove the taboo from the conversation on sexual assault, and to treat your body as your own and your partner’s body as his/her own, no exceptions.

Intimate Partner Violence: Prevention and Infomation by Blogger Jade

                More and more colleges are adding sexual assault prevention programs to their curriculum.  It may be represented as a one-time seminar, added to a list of other safety prevention programs on campus.  This is an incredible initiative, which informs student’s valuable information about how to protect themselves. 

Some view sexual or physical assault as being committed by someone the survivor does not know, this does happen.  A percentage of sexual assault is committed by someone the survivor does know, perhaps someone the survivor is in a relationship with.  Intimate partner violence also is something that can happen in a relationship. This can be hard sometimes to recognize.  The person you are in a relationship with cares about you, does things for you, and may love you.  How could this person hurt you?  It does happen and no one deserves to become a victim of intimate partner violence. 

Colleges are making leaps to include knowledge on sexual assault prevention, but also should include intimate partner violence.  Some campuses have made efforts that include knowledge on intimate partner violence. When I was still on campus I remember seeing signs about what is ok in a relationship, and what is not ok.  It was a nice visual and a wake-up call for some but other measures can be taken.  Awareness walks, panels of survivors to speak on campus, and support groups are an excellent way to raise awareness about intimate partner violence.

Going back to grad school this semester, being on campus and seeing all the on campus activities in full swing makes me really excited.  It is great to see campuses adding information on sexual assault and intimate partner violence.  Both topics can empower and inform students about how to stay safe and have an excellent college experience. 

Off to Freshmen Year Prepared! by blooger Jade

Going off to school can be an exciting time!  With that excitement comes some fear: will I do well in classes?, will I like my roommate?, what is the college experience going to be like?   With so much to think about it sometimes can be hard to forget about the important details of keeping yourself safe in your freshmen year.  Becoming a victim of rape is not something that happens to “those people,” it can happen to anyone at anytime

The good news is that you can take some precautions to protect yourself.  Traveling with a friend or a group is a great way to explore campus, also an excellent way to travel at night.  Be cautious with your information, in the first couple of weeks you are meeting so many new people.  While it is an exciting time remember that not everyone may be your friend.  Giving out personal information to numerous people may not be the wisest decision.  Also taking a self-defense class is a great idea, you can work out and learn how to protect yourself at the same time.

Freshmen year is an amazing part of the college experience; however, it can be so much more enjoyable if you take the time to implement a few safety measures.